JULIA: "I was never popular at school, I was super super skinny until I was 15 years old and then for many reasons my body changed and I started getting more attention... You’re bullied for being fat, for being skinny, for being pretty, less pretty...
You’re bullied for simply existing and your job is to learn confidence... to set boundaries.
Bullies… I met them all. In my personal, intimate, professional relationship...
Well... Guess what hurt people do… They simply hurt people too!
Well... Guess what hurt people do… They simply hurt people too!
It's fascinating to notice that our strength and confidence oscillates all the time: we might be perceived as strong, determined and confident by some people and on the other end, others might perceive us as weak, with low self esteem. And that’s where the bully game begins!
I feel like talking about this today, doctor. Like Jennifer Lawrence once said: “I’m over being likeable”. So am I, Jenny!
Funny because there are very subtle ways of being manipulative, of getting your own way without people noticing someone's needs are being repressed, without people noticing someone is being hurt.
Funny because there are very subtle ways of being manipulative, of getting your own way without people noticing someone's needs are being repressed, without people noticing someone is being hurt.
I know I have to practice being a more forgiving person maybe... But... On the other hand, I question myself many times: “Isn’t forgiving a bit overrated?”.
Isn't it Doctor?
It hurts me a little to make this question. I grew up believing that forgiving is divine. And so we forgive over and over again. We let ourselves stay in dysfunctional relationships because we’re constantly thinking that we’re better and more mature than those who hurt us. We know that, in fact, they need help, they need us, they’ve been hurt before too.
They cry and we forgive them, we give them a second chance, a million chances… and we stay. One more time… we stay….
In the meantime we’re missing something important: our own life. Then we become afraid of a such selfish thought “missing my own life!?” We feel guilty, weak again and again… and we keep staying! We don’t want to be selfish, we want to be a forgiving, divine and mature human being.
Time goes on… Life goes on… Until one day where we wake up and we look back... No one really valued our forgiving attitude, our giving soul and it feels too late to catch up with stuff. Suddenly, the person we need to forgive is our own self. Isn’t it funny? Forgive yourself for being too forgiving to others?"
by Lilly
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